Individualism vs Collectivism

Individualism and collectivism are very important issues to discuss considering we in America are very much form an individualistic culture. Individualism is the belief that people should do things for themselves as far as their lifestyle, their problems and their possessions. This way of thinking is very much promoted in American society through the media and cultural norms. Thinking for yourself and being your own person is constantly pushed in American culture. I agree with what the book said about individualistic cultures using horizontal relationships. I find in my own social circle that most of my friends are from the same social class and mostly the same sort of family relationships. While individualism can be discussed as it applies to American cultures, the opposite can be applied to collectivist cultures.
Collectivism uses the mindset that personal decisions should benefit the group as a whole. This is very much opposite of an American mentality and really puts emphasis on the strength of the group. The example in the book illustrates this in a good way by referring to the fact that Chinese people use their family name first, emphasizing the importance of the group. Collectivist cultures utilize vertical relationships where some people may have a higher social status than other members of the group. Collectivist cultures are interesting to look at when you are used to an individualist culture.

Rationality, Perfectability, and Mutuability

I very much agree that anyone is capable of discovering the truth through logical analysis in rationality. We are very much taught rationality in college and in a more basic sense in life. College is very much a social institution that pushes rationality as a way of critical thinking and making the right decisions. This is easy to agree with.
I very much do not agree with perfectability. I am under the impression that people are born inherently innocent given they hadn't done anything wrong. I don't think people can be held as sinful until they are actually mature and coherent enough to know the repercussions of their actions. The only institution I can believe that uses this premise is the Puritans or Quakers.
I agree somewhat with the mutuability premise that people are shaped from their environment and surroundings. This is a good explanation to a certain extent. Eventually people have to make there own rational decisions that go outside the environmnet their exposed to. The social institution this can be applied to is any educational environment one is exposed to at a young age. This is a part where environment and the people around you play an important role in your life.

Creatures of Our Culture

Our daily lives are very much shaped by our culture. This is the way we learn how to live. The people around us that are part of this culture learn how to live the same way and this slowly becomes collective. Everybody lives in the same sort of way. There are many influences such as the media and just general attitudes of people that develop over time. People that learn to live in the same environment are naturally going to have the same habits, beliefs, and barriers that keep them living the same way. Being multicultural and getting along interculturally is very difficult, but it is not impossible.
If you are in the same area with the same type of people, it is only natural that you may become ethnocentric or think your culture is more elite than others. This is becuase you will have no reason to think differently. The only way to break barriers interculturally is to become exposed to different ways of life. Be open to the fact that not the all groups of people see the world in the same way. Knowing about the attitudes of other cultures and being aware of their history is very important to communicating interculturally. In order to do this, people must be open minded.

Adaptors

Adaptors are nervous habits that pretty much everyone has. The book describes it as a version of a security blanket. Some of these adaptors are worse than others. Some people also have more adaptors than other people. I feel like I always have to be moving in many cases always hitting my pen on the desk or tapping my feet. The book discusses how these are habits that satisfy personal needs or stresses. I especially feel like this is due to stress in my personal case. Currently being at a debate tournament, it is easy to see many other people's adaptors.
In a situation where people feel a lot of stress and nervousness in debate, there are many adaptors in play. There was a girl I met who was telling me she couldn' t stop playing with her jewlery when she was speaking. Other adaptors I've observed this weekend include pulling at the neck, playing with the collar,and touching the face. I was just going through the chapter and found adaptors incredibly relevant to the activities I went through this weekend.

Nonverbal Ques in Other Cultures

Emblems are the kinesics that stand out as different from culture to culture. The book defines emblems as "kinesic behaviors whose direct verbal translations are known to all members of a social group." I haven't had any experience outside of American mainstream culture so I can use examples from the book. The hardest one to get used to for me would be the example used in the book with the head nodding. In Greece, Italy and surrounding areas nodding the head forward and backwards means no while shaking it from side to side means yes. That is just so natural to me now to do it the opposite way that it would be hard to grasp in traveling to these areas of the world.
When traveling to Hawaii there was a hand signal that was introduced along with language that is unfamiliar. The term "hang loose" means to chill out and go with the flow. The hand signal that went with it was folding the middle three fingers and outstretching the thumb and pinky. This was probably the most foreign thing I've come in contact with having never traveled out of the country.

Mistaking Non-verbal Language

I can't think of a time when I had mistakingly read someone else's nonverbal language, but I can think of a time when someone mistakingly read mine. Most of the time when I am in a bad mood my girlfriend can tell just by my nonverbal ques. Most of the time she is right, but there have been a few when she is not. Sometimes she will ask me what's wrong when there is nothing really wrong besides the fact that I'm tired. Sometimes she thinks I'm angry at her when I am really just tired. There always has to be an emphasis on context like the textbook said.
Considering the context of the situation when reading nonverbal language is very important. nonverbal language is never a given and that has to do with the ambiguity of it. This also reminds me of the last discussion question about judging people and putting them into groups. If you don't know what a person has been through before you make a judgement about their nonverbal language your estimate may be wrong. The best way to increase the accuracy of nonverbal language reading would be to consider all the posibilities of the language being used and try to pick the best explanation.

Improving Interpretation

I find this concept very interesting because it comes into play in all parts of communicating. In the case of a college student it is very important in a formal setting. In interpersonal realtionships it is necessary to maintain relationships.
College students have to place an importance on improving interpretation. This is necessary for success in classes with complex material. The idea of the perception check reminded me of a concept called reflective listening. In order to communicate successfully, you need to let the sender know how you interpreted the message in order for them to know they got the message through the way they intended it. Reflective listing or perception checking is also important in interpersonal relationships.
In disagreements the idea of interpreting successfully is very important. Everyone has their own way of communicating and this needs to be tended to in interpersonal relationships. People communicate in unclear ways especially when they are very reliant on their emotions. This is the most important time to deconstruct the message and ignore your feelings. This is a concept that stood out in the book. Considering the other persons feelings is something that is needed for successful communication to take place.

Gender Differences in Communication

I agree that men and women communicate differently than each other in certain areas and contexts. A lot of men like to show their toughness and usually speaks in a way that shows this. This often involves not really expressing emotion in a healthy manner in many cases. I've read about this phenomena as being called the "cowboy syndrome". Emotions are bottled up and sometimes come out in violent or awkward ways. This is usually in interpersonal or intimate relationships. In a work or school setting, I think there are a lot fewer differences in the way each gender communicates.
As far as female communication goes in an interpersonal or intimate setting, females simply communicate based on emotion. They are able to communicate their emotions very effectively and this could be a negative or positive thing. Many times it is easier to understand how a female feels because of explicit expression. Other times they may be a little too expressive and this could be a negative aspect. In summarizing I think there is a big difference in the way females and males communicate.

Perception of People

In the past I found it was very easy to judge people just based on they way they look. Perceiving others came automatically with judging people. This was based solely on their looks and came through chronically accessible constructs. I would group people by the way they dressed or talked. This would allow me to make quick judgements about pretty much everybody. As you go through life and meet a larger variety of people, you learn that everyone comes form a different backgorund and it gets harder and harder to group similar looking people. This leads me to a quote from the text.
"Cognitive complexity is a mark of maturity and is necessary for good communication. (Trenholm, 2008)" I feel like having more life experience has led me to beleive that you can't judge someone without knowing them a little bit and hearing about their own life experiences. This allows us to make these judgements more fair to everyone that we interact with. The thing about cognitive complexity is it takes into account that everyone is different. Differentiated observation takes this into account and notices that everyone has had a different combination of life experiences that makes them who they are. This has to be taken into account with everyone you meet.